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December 05, 2008 12:00 AM

WinInfo Short Takes: Week of December 5, 2008

Windows IT Pro
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An often irreverent look at some of the week's other news, including the resumption of the five-day work week, my Windows 7 release date predictions, Microsoft: car maker, Microsoft's new online business chief, IBM and Ubuntu waste time and money, and more...

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There's nothing quite like returning to work after four days off. It's just not natural. In fact, they should have made this week a four day work week just to ease us back into a normal schedule. On Monday, the alarm clock was like an unwelcome booming beacon of doom, and I've had this weird, low-level, not-quite-sick thing going on ever since. Yes, it's the holidays again. And it's time to get your cheer on.

I'll be in the Redmond area most of next week to visit Microsoft. More news on that as it develops, I guess.

Leo and I recorded a new episode of the Windows Weekly podcast on Thursday, right on schedule. Because of my trip next week, we'll record the next episode next Friday
http://www.winsupersite.com/article/Paul/windows-weekly-podcast.aspx

But wait, there more. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter, Friendfeed and the SuperSite Blog.

Short Takes

My predictions on the Windows 7 release date
There's been a lot of speculation about when Microsoft would ship Windows 7, its eagerly awaited follow-up to Windows Vista. So far, I've suggested that the company would ship Windows 7 far earlier than most people thought. But now I'm ready to make a number of more specific predictions myself, and add to the speculation. It's pretty widely known that Microsoft will ship a beta release (and a public one at that) of Windows 7 in January. This beta will be the only beta and it will be followed by a single release candidate build, and then the final version, all in quick succession. I expect Windows 7 to be finalized by April 2009 at the latest, and to be completed simultaneously with Windows Vista/Windows Server 2008 Service Pack 2 (SP2), which is also due in April. (Windows 7 and SP2 share more code than people realize as well, by the way.) Windows 7 will be made broadly available to consumers and business customers no later than June 2009. And those, folks, are my predictions for the release of Windows 7.

What if Microsoft really did make cars?
One of the longest-running jokes in the tech industry is, "can you imagine what it would be like if Microsoft made cars?" The joke is intended to lampoon Microsoft's design aesthetic (or lack thereof), of course, and the punch line always involves vehicles that blue screen and the like. Hardy-har-har. But what if Microsoft really *did* make cars? I'll tell you this: That company would be fiscally solvent, would have quickly embraced innovative technologies like alternative fuel, and would never have had to go to Washington, hat in hand, looking for a multi-billion-dollar handout to keep it from going out of business. In other words, if Microsoft really did make cars, it wouldn't be anything like GM, Ford, or Chrysler. It would be successful.

Microsoft makes brilliant choice for its Internet unit
Microsoft has left its position of President, Online Services Group open since the genius behind the Yahoo! takeover left the company. But now they're ready to fill that position. And as you might expect, the software giant has picked someone with the experience and success needed to take its struggling online business to the next level where it can finally compete with Google. I'm referring of course to Qi Lu, the Yahoo! vice president most recently in charge of that company's online search and advertising technology. Wait, what? You picked a person who has already proven he can't defeat Google? Really? Apparently, I'm not the only one confused by this pick. Former aQuantive CEO Brian McAndrews, who was a senior executive in Microsoft's Online Services Group and one of only a few candidates who could have gotten Lu's new job, immediately left the company when the decision was announced.

IBM and Ubuntu team for Microsoft-free PC
Which was fun and all back in 1999, but I'm just curious: Were any business customers actually asking for such a thing? Former tech industry heavyweight IBM has unveiled a new virtualized desktop environment called, uh ... well. Hm. It doesn't actually have a name. They just call it a "Linux-Based, Virtual Desktop," a "Linux-desktop solution," and a "virtual desktop," the first two of which are grammatically questionable. Basically what we're looking at here is a server-based solution since, you know, IBM only sells servers these days. It runs Ubuntu Linux, which is fine, and a bunch of old-school IBM solutions like IBM Lotus Symphony and IBM Lotus Notes. I'm sure it will be a best seller, guys. Nice work.

Expect a smaller CES next month
This will be the third year in a row that I won't be going to the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in Las Vegas in January. In the past, I've justified this decision because CES has gotten too big, loud, and complicated to be valuable, but maybe it's time to reassess that position. Apparently, CES will be dramatically downsized this year because of falling attendance. It's gotten so bad, in fact, that the impossible has happened: Some Vegas hotels are actually lowering their extravagant room prices for the week of CES in a bid to lure business travelers. So will I change my mind and head out to Las Vegas next month? Absolutely not. I already booked a vacation in Florida.

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Comments
  • MysterMask
    4 years ago
    Dec 08, 2008

    Doing an 's/MS/Apple/g' on some old Microsoft jokes is as funny as MS is innovativ. Congrats fangirls ..

  • subzerohitman721
    4 years ago
    Dec 07, 2008

    @guruguru,

    Since MysterMask thinks the ideas are worn and beaten, here's my addendum to your list based on actual Apple related and OS-X 10.5 problems in 2008.

    - The Apple car would be in the shop most of the year dealing with over 250 recalls related to safety issues.

    - Deceptive advertising woud lead to lawsuits in the U.S. and advertising banned in the UK.

    - The cars woud attempt to activate for new ownership but everyone activating the new iPhone model would crash the servers.

    - If the car's onboard computer crashes and you attempt to restore via Mobile Me, it will take a ridiculously long time if never.

    - The version of Leopard's performanance instabilities would render the vehicle glitchy and shut down the engine.

    - LIke Thurrott, he'd have to put a copy of Vista to get any real driving done.

    - Some hacker would setup a malicious website and crash the engine via Safari within 2 minutes.

    - Steve Jobs would have to give away free mobile me access while they figure out what went wrong.

    - 3rd Party apps for the iCar would mysteriously disappear off the App Store.

    - Finally, Mac legal woud declare that anything in the advertising including the car's working condition woud not be accepted as a statement of fact.

    Enjoy. Peace.

  • MysterMask
    4 years ago
    Dec 05, 2008

    May we please have better Windows shills! The old ones are out of ideas and look kind of worn and beaten ..

  • Jorn
    4 years ago
    Dec 05, 2008

    A very good one, guruguru.
    Just made me laugh out loud.

  • L
    4 years ago
    Dec 05, 2008

    It would be even funnier if apple made cars.

    -They could come without seatbelts because they are "secure out of the box".

    -You'd have to get a new car when your battery dies.

    -Since their stop speed would be 45mph, they would come with a disclaimer that "no reasonable person would believe the speedometer as advertised on this car".

    -They would combine the accelerator and the break pedal into one obtuse device.

    -You'd be forced to get your tires, gas (or electricity/hydrogen), oil, and all maintenance from the autorized apple dealer.

    -Every 2 years you'd be forced to pay 179 bucks for a software update that adds hundreds of new features like...3 speed settings for power windows, and 5 horn tones.

    -You would not be able to do two things at the same time (like listen to the radio and drive).

    -There would be one model, all would look the same, but come in different colors and be called auto-chromatic.

    -You could not upgrade, under any circumstance, any part of the car without expressed written consent from apple.

    -Apple would try to control the bridge systems so that older apple cars cannot fit and owners will be forced to buy a new one every 5 years or so.

    My second point is, I'd pay for an IBM-Linux free pc. Even if it has a fruit logo.

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